Thursday things

  • It’s amazing how much I can get done when I actually remove the distractions (TV, YouTube, my phone, etc.)
  • Currently in class watching a documentary about inclusion that was actually filmed a few towns over. [And people in my class are laughing hysterically and acting like the girl in the video is some kind of monster. It bugs me that, in a room full of aspiring teachers, the stigma surrounding mental illness is alive and well. A lot of the things the girl in the documentary struggles with, I struggled with in middle school. Self-harm, self-destructive thoughts, anger, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem…among others. If things had gone differently in my life, in high school, I could’ve easily been in the situation she was in. Why can we watch a documentary about a little boy with cerebral palsy with tears in our eyes, and five minutes later, watch a documentary about a teenage girl with ADHD, depression, and emotional problems while muffling our laughter and rolling our eyes in disgust? I wouldn’t want anyone who passes that kind of judgment on human beings teaching my children…or teaching alongside me. My professor is actually contributing to the ridiculous laughter in the class by making comments like, “Would you want to be on the bus with her?”]
  • I saw one of my best friends today. It was wonderful and perfect. I miss her a lot- she doesn’t live that far away (~4 hours), but it’s far enough so that we don’t see each other as much as I’d like.
  • I am really considering law school in the (distant) future. I want to just start off teaching in a classroom and see where I want to go from there. I am so passionate about school law, though, particularly in the area of bullying and cyber-bullying. I think it’s because I was bullied badly in middle school and no adults in my school ever helped me to stop the bullying or even acknowledged it was happening. I want to prevent other kids from going through what I went through.
  • I think I’ve had too much caffeine today and my eye is twitching. Eek.
  • It feels weird writing a post without mentioning headaches…BUT (crosses fingers) I have been headache-free since Tuesday morning. It’s pretty remarkable, especially considering all the stormy and rainy weather we’ve been having.
  • I no longer have to do this thing I’ve been dreading for months this weekend. Yes, I feel badly about backing out of it- it was shitty of me. However, the relief I feel over not having to do it is pretty amazing- although I do recognize I should never have committed to it in the first place. And the reason I gave for not doing it- chronic migraine- is certainly true and legitimate.
  • With that being said, I’m looking forward to spending time with my family this weekend, getting work done, and resting.
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Stuff that’s on my mind tonight:

  • How my closest friends will always be my closest friends, regardless of distance. Whenever we Skype or talk on the phone or have long-awaited hang outs in person…it’s like no time has passed at all and nothing has changed.
  • It’s fun to be REALLY drunk approximately once per season…for me, anyway. Friday night was the night my wasted summer self made an appearance. I met some new people, sang “Come On Eileen” with one of my best friends, drank 1.5 rum buckets, and laid down on the floor of my living room and refused to move.
  • I really love doing somewhat mundane things around the house on Sundays with Doug. It’s not exciting, but it’s our routine and it feels comfortable. Plus we really do need an entire day to do all of the following: cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping/putting food away/prepping food for the week, folding & putting away clothes, etc.
  • I’ve been thinking about whether or not we’ll renew our lease (it’s up in November). After having lived in this apartment for 2 years, it’s a bit difficult to imagine living anywhere else, at least in this city. Also, I’ve been doing a bit of looking, and in our price range, there isn’t much out there that’s better than where we currently are. We lived in one other apartment for six months before moving here, so this really has been our “home” for the majority of our relationship. Not quite ready to leave it behind yet.
  • But I really want a pet. And we can’t have one here.
  • I can’t believe there are only three weeks left of our summer program. I’m excited, but at the same time, I am reminded that we’re approaching the last few weeks of summer. I’m looking forward to our anniversary trip to Boston, a few more beach days, spending time with friends, late night ice cream runs, having all the windows open, and summer storms.
  • I felt SO GOOD working out today. When I don’t work our for a few days in a row, I always seem to forget how amazing I feel when I’m drenched in sweat! Lately, it hasn’t been one kind of exercise in particular that makes me feel like I can take on the world- it’s anything and everything.
  • Sometimes I really misjudge people. Our neighbor (who I have complained about both online and in-person to EVERYONE in my life) is actually a really cool guy. We’ve had many long conversations with him this week, and I just brought him some of the banana bread I baked tonight. I have the feeling we’ll actually hang out together one of these days.